Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Paalam, 2008 (Farewell, 2008)

Magtatapos na naman ang isang taon. (A year is about to end again.)

Hmm, tumitingin sa likod , kamusta ba ang 2008? (Hmm, looking back, how was 2008?)

Sa taong 2008... (In the year 2008)

...hindi pa rin ako nagka-boyfriend (pero muntik na he he at may mga umaligid ngunit di naman mga katalo) [I still didn't have a boyfriend...but I almost did he he and there were some suitors who were not "suitable"]

...ako ay nakapagturo muli sa UP at enjoy naman ako (walang choice ang mga estudyante ko kundi pagdusahan ang mga jokes ko) [I was able to teach again at the University of the Philippines and I enjoyed students had no choice but to bear with my jokes]

...marami akong naging proyekto at bagong kliyente (subali't bakit wala pa rin akong ipon?) [I had several projects and new clients...but how come I still don't have any savings?]

...dumagsa ang mga karamdaman, dumami ang mga gamot at duktor na kinukunsulta ko (kaya pala wala akong ipon pero di bale, marami namang ngipin) [I had several illnesses, my medicines increased and I am now seeing more doctors...that is why I don't have any savings but never mind, I have a lot of teeth]

...dumami ang aking mga puting buhok (pero hindi pa sapat para magtina ako) [I had more white hair...but not enough for me to dye]

...natuto akong magluto ng mangilan-ngilang ulam (ngunit dahil sa kawalan ng ehersisyo - due to lack of practice - nakalimutan ko na yata lahat ng natutunan ko) [I learned how to cook a few dishes but due to lack of practice, I seem to have forgotten all that I have learned]

...may mga nakilala ako at sila'y mga bago kong kaibigan na ngayon (sayang, yung mga cute sa kanila, either babae o may asawa) [I met some people and now they are new is a pity that the cute ones are either female or married]

...nakabili ako ng digital camera (na inarbor ng anak ko), ng MP3 player (na inarbor ng anak ko), at ng mga damit (buti na lang straight na lalaki ang anak ko) [I was able to buy a digital camera (which my son got from me), an MP3 player (which my son got from me), and clothes (it's a good thing my son is a straight guy)]

...nakabisita ako ng ilang beses sa Women's Correctional, nakapag-donate ako ng books sa isang NGO, at yung iba kong mga kawanggawa sa 2009 ko na gagawin [I was able to visit the Women's Correctional a number of time, I was able to donate books to an NGO, and my other charity work I will do in 2009]

...hindi ko pa rin natapos yung libro kong, "Mission: Possible!", pero may ideya na ako para sa isang screenplay "Ang Mundo ni Minda", isang stageplay "The Best of Nuts", isang pang libro "I Ain't Manic-Depressive, I'm Bi-Polar!", at naumpisahan ko ang blog na ito, "I Love Humor & More" [I still was not able to finish my book, "Mission:Possible!" but I have ideas for a screenplay, "Ang Mundo ni Minda" [The World of Minda], a stageplay "The Best of Nuts", another book "I Ain't Manic-Depressive, I'm Bi-Polar!", and I was able to start this blog, "I Love Humor & More]

...marami akong natutunan sa Internet, marami akong inalisan pero marami din akong sinalihan at binisitang bagong websites [I learned a lot about the Internet, I left a lot of sites, joined several and visited new ones]

...mas naging close kami ng nanay ko at anak ko, at mga family members ko dahil ang dalas naming magka-gettogether ngayong taon na ito [I became closer to my mother and son, and to my family member because we had several get-togethers this year]

...hindi ako masyadong tumaba, lalo pang gumanda, at medyo mayabang pa rin [I did not gain too much weight, I because more beautiful, at remained somewhat proud]

Haay, 2008, nalulungkot ako at kailangan na tayong magpaalam sa isa't isa. [Well, 2008, I'm sa because we have to say farewell to each other.]

Pero excited na ako para sa 2009! Bagong taon, bagong pagkakataong (makahanap ng true love ko). [But I'm excited for 2009! New year, new opportunity (to find my true love)]

Tuesday, December 30, 2008


Take these three sentences:
1) I am dying of cancer.
2) I am dying my hair red.
3) I am dying to tell you "I love you".

All three sentences start with the same three short words but these three words take on a totally different meaning with each sentence. The profound lesson here is: we should let people finish speaking before we ourselves speak.

Speaking of "dying", I've decided not to dye my hair just yet. They all say that once you start dying your hair, you cannot stop. And it can be expensive. Someone told me that there are 200 strands of hair per square inch of scalp. If my hair reaches more than 30% white, I guess that is my signal to start dying my hair. Meanwhile, I shall just pluck away my white hair or ask somebody else to do it (like what my sister did last Christmas day).

On a sad note, a batchmate from Maryknoll just lost her mother. (I hope I will have the opportunity to attend the wake today.)

As one gets older, more and more people you know, or relatives of people you know, die.

There are three things in life that are certain: death, taxes and criticism. Death, I cannot do anything about. Taxes, I just pay as dutifully as I can and leave the rest to the BIR. And criticism? Accept it graciously, give it sparingly, and for full measure, affirm and appreciate others generously.

There goes my thought for today.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Two Friends

I have two friends.

One is "T". She's extremely beautiful. Has 5 children, including one baby she recently adopted. She has been separated from her husband for more than a decade already. T met someone online. He is an expat in Italy. He proposed marriage to her and promised to accept her children as his own. He was supposed to come to the Philippines for the "pamanhikan". But he has not called for two weeks. Sad story but not necessarily the end for T. It's his loss, really.

My other friend is "C". An extremely religious women. She served her parish faithfully for years. There she met "B" when his wife was still alive. B is a doctor who is also a religious person. His wife died of cancer. Years passed and C started to have "feelings" for B. However, B met someone who became his girlfriend. Heartbroken, C distanced herself from B. Like T, she adopted a baby boy and poured her love on him. Little did C know that B and his girlfriend had split ways. Little did she know, too, that B also has feelings for her. And so, to make the story short, they fell in love and they are getting married very soon. Happy story for a woman who waited for the right man.

Hmm, there's a lesson here somewhere. You figure it out.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

My Mission In Life

I have been commissioned to write a book entitled, "Mission:Possible!" Since it has been more than 4 years, maybe it should be called "Mission: Impossible!".

It's all about the importance of knowing your mission in life, crafting your mission statement, and learning about mission-aries (people who live and breathe their mission).

Since my very first published book (I have a total of three so far), I've written about MY own mission in life. After much reflection and meditation, I arrived at the following mission statement:

My mission in life is to be a joyful instrument of God's love and a loving instrument of God's joy through:

T - eaching
A - ppreciating
W - riting
A - ffirming
S - peaking
S - erving with a
S - mile

Yes, I enjoy teaching but not only in a professional sense. I feel I can best teach others by the way I lead my life.

I have long realized and recognized the value of appreciation and gratefulness. It is the key to joy. I also know that people long to be affirmed, and never get tired of it.

I believe that when one has been given a gift, he/she must use it to the fullest. The Lord has given me the gift of words - written and spoken. Hence, I am both a writer and a speaker. I have to hone both skills to bless the world and inspire other people.

And of course, we are all here to serve others - not grudgingly, but willingly.

If you haven't discovered your mission in life yet, let me leave you with this quote:

"There are two greatest moments in one's life:
The moment he was born
And the moment he discovers why."

Saturday, December 27, 2008

My Perennial New Year's Resolutions

Like most people, I come up with a list of New Year's Resolutions. Mine usually looks like this:

1) To lose XX number of pounds
2) To be healthier
3) To be a better Marketing Research Consultant
4) To earn XX amount of money
5) To save XX amount of money
6) To write a book
7) To write a screenplay
8) To write a stageplay
9) To write for magazines again
10) To have a boyfriend
11) To be a more loving person
12) To spend more time with my son
13) To read the Bible from cover to cover
14) To be closer to God
15) To be holy and chaste

...the list goes longer. But I have yet to experience a year when I was able to accomplish all my New Year's resolutions. In fact, the opposite usually occurs. By the first few months, my resolve has weakened and I totally discard my list.

Oh well, I wonder how my 2009 list of New Year's resolutions would look like? Abangan?

Friday, December 26, 2008

The Story Behind Our Names

People usually have an interesting story behind their name. Mine is as uninteresting as uninteresting can be. My mom named me after one of her dormmates and they weren't even close! She had to come up with a name starting with N because she and my Dad had decided to give all their children names starting with N (my Dad's name is Napoleon, that's why).

I'm the second to the eldest child and the eldest daughter. That could mean only one thing. Our eldest is a boy and his name is Noel. So I jokingly call him, "The first, Noel". My Dad's second name is Emmanuel so at least my Kuya's name has rhyme and reason.

Anyway back to my name. I immediately know if the person I am talking to is Bisaya when he/she calls me Nemia. But it's not just the pronunciation. It is the spelling. What gets me is that people also tend to misspell my name as Nemia. Now, guess what I have? Renal anemia (true to my name!)

My sister, who follows after me, is Noemi. [One time I had a special T-shirt made for her with the words "Do you NOEMI?" on it.] As a little girl, I could not pronounce her name so I called her "Oyie". The nickname stuck through the years. These days, I call her Oyang.

The fourth in the family has the most unique name. When my mom was pregnant with him, she and my dad watched "Lawrence of Arabia". So they wanted a name that sounded like Lawrence but started with N. So since "Nawrence" looked weird, my brother ended up with the following name - Norenz. Cute, no?

The fifth and last in the family was named after my uncle Eric who died early of a heart attack. Of course, there was the mandatory N and for good measure, a K at the end. Hence, Nerick.

There you have it Noel, Nimia, Noemi, Norenz, Nerick. The Gamo family.

I'm glad our parents didn't have a warped sense of humor like mine. They didn't name us Si, Nila, Ga, Pini, and (as suggested by my male friends) Jo.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Christmas Family Reunions

Ever since I could recall, Christmas has always been spent with my family members - my extended family (including aunts, uncles, cousins, in-laws, nephews and nieces). Today was no different. I always enjoy the company of my family. I have been blessed with a close-knit family whose members do not mind seeing each other as often as possible. I would say we find time to gather together at least once a month...a special occasion like Christmas, New Year, our Dad's death anniversary, couple's anniversary, birthdays, etc.

It is like we have an insatiable desire to be with each other perhaps because we stayed together, lived together for the longest time. Once upon a time, we - my parents and us five siblings - lived together in a big house (I mean, home) in Diliman, Quezon City. Even when each of us got married one by one, we stayed in that place for as long as possible. Since it was such a huge house, we would invite many relatives, and even those from far away Batangas would come and visit.

Ah, Christmas! What a fun, fun day! A beautiful time to spend special moments which will be added to our special memories.

It's not just the food, of course. The shrimp royale, the lengua, the lumpiang sariwa, the kaldereta, the lechon, the pancit, the barbecue, and so on. It's not just the gifts and the cash distributed by older members of the family to the younger ones. It's not just the picture-taking, the wearing of nice clothes, the exchange of stories.

It's all about celebrating the birth of our Saviour TOGETHER as a united family, as one, no matter how many we have become. Like all the Christmases in the past, this has been a truly blessed day!

(And I was able to write about it in my blogsite in record time.)

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

The Best Christmas Gifts

I remember, when I was a little girl, I really looked forward to Christmas. I was particularly eager to open my presents and see what Santa gave me that year.

I don't know when I stopped believing in Santa Claus. But I shall always remember the gifts that my parents gave to me as a child. I loved receiving tea sets because one of my favorite game was pretending I had guests coming over and I would serve them food and drinks. I also remember getting a doll for Christmas. Her name was Marina. She was a talking doll. When I pushed a button, she would say' "Mama, I'm hungry!". Then, I can never forget the day I received my very first wristwatch. It was gold and I felt very "adult".

Years have passed and I still enjoy receiving presents - not just on Christmas, but on any occasion (parinig parinig). But come to think of it, the best gifts are not store-bought, gift-wrapped, ribboned and come with a price tag. The following are for me, the best gifts ever - Christmas season or not:

...the gift of joy (not toilet paper or dishwashing detergent) but giving good cheer whereever you are

...the gift of humor - aba, mahirap yatang magpatawa!

...the gift of peace and forgiveness - it takes humility to forgive someone lalo na kung dehado ka

...the gift of praise and affirmation - hindi lang mga kulang sa pansin ang kelangang mapuri

...the gift of understanding - mahirap intindihin ang mahirap ma-gets but we all have to try

...the gift of loyalty - hindi madaling maging tapat sa mga kaibigan pero hindi ibig sabihin ay kukunsintihin natin ang kanilang mga maling ginagawa

...the gift of companionship and presence - you can buy all the expensive gifts in the world, but if you are never present for a person, what good is all that?

...the gift of wisdom and advice - sometimes, people just need some wise words from us just to get back on the right track

...the gift of kindness - in the form of a kind act or a kind word can mean a lot

...the gift of love - that much-uttered word is actually difficult to give in the true sense of the word

Yes, let us all give love on Christmas day and throughout the year!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Let's Have Pun with Christmas Carols

Christmas is just two days away. Time to sing (and joke about) some Christmas carols.

1) What Christmas carol do you sing when you're looking for your shoe strings?
Pasko na, SINTAs ko, hanap-hanap kita...

2) Anong Christmas carol ang tungkol sa mga babaeng binabalisawsaw?
Jingle belles, jingle belles, jingle all the way...

3) Anong tawag mo sa gabi when one gets caught quietly...?
Silent night, huli night...

4) Bakit hindi popular ang doMc tuwing Pasko?
'Tis the season to BEE-JOLLI..

5) Anong gabi ang pabonggahan ang mga artista nang nagkikintabang suot?
O holy night...(the stars are brightly shining)

6) Sinong malapit na santa ang parating na?
Santa Close is coming to town

7) Sinong reindeer ang gumagamit ng Pledge?
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose

8) Bakit malungkot ako kung ako ang nanay ni Paz?
Minsan lang 'sang taon, Paz-ko'y dumarating

9) Anong menthol candy ang dinedecorate pag Pasko?
Halls (Deck the Halls with boughs of holly...)

10) What's a global brand of toilet paper or dishwashing detergent?
Joy (Joy to the world...)

Till next time...

Monday, December 22, 2008

These Hands of Mine

There was a time when I would go every week to the park near our place. I would bring a book, my journal, rosary, food and drinks, and sometimes, even my guitar. I would sit across the lagoon and enjoy the view and the breeze all the way till sunset. What a beautiful time! I call it my "Wednesdate with the Lord" because I would often go on a Wednesday.

Only one thing marred the whole thing. I would see lovers here and there - hugging, kissing...but what really made me envious was couples holding hands!

I don't know what it is about holding hands that gets me. I look at my hands and feel them - they are oooh so soft. Don't take my word for it. You should try it some time he he. So I asked God, "Lord, why did You give me such soft, velvety hands when no one is holding them?" In the silence of my heart, God answered:

"I gave you those hands, not (necessarily) for a man to hold them but...

...for you to prepare coffee to all those who need it [but Lord, the best coffee is the one prepared by a wife to her HUSBAND!]

...for you to wipe away the tears of a child [but Lord, it would be great if I could have my own last-minute child by a HUSBAND]

...for you to congratulate someone who has made any achievement, no matter how small [but Lord, if You give me a HUSBAND, I will give him all the encouragement he needs]

...for you to applaud even when no one else is clapping [but Lord, I would do a lot more affirming if You gave me a HUSBAND]

...for you to massage the body of someone who is tired and stressed out [but Lord, that would be a great way to serve someone I could call my HUSBAND]

...for you to write words of inspiration and joy to bless the world and make it a happier one [but Lord, before I make the world happy, can't I make my HUSBAND happy first?]

Actually, it was a long list of what I could do with these hands of mine. And I kept pestering God for what I wanted. Oh well, I might as well just sing:

"These hands of mine...God gave these hands to me..."
to love and cherish others - HUSBAND or not.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Christmas Puns

Feeling punny na naman ako. And since it's Christmas season, let's
have some Pamaskong jokes for everybody (since I cannot afford to
buy gifts he he).

1) Why do prisoners look forward to Christmas season?
Kasi maraming PAROL!

2) Sinong girl ang popular na popular tuwing Pasko?
E di si CAROL!

3) Sinong Santa ang boy?
E di si Santa Claus!

4) Bakit maraming napapaaway pag Pasko?
Kasi maraming nagha-HAMON.

5) Bakit maraming nababasted pag Pasko?
Dahil style bulok - keso-de-BOLA

6) What's so royal about Christmas?
Ang mga REGAL-o.

7) What do you call a very long dawn mass?
Misa de KALYO

8) Anong tawag mo sa kainan na walang isnaban?
NO-CHE buena

9) Use belen in a sentence:
Marami akong BELEN sa kamag-anak kong OFW na uuwi ngayong Pasko.

10) Whose nose is like a book?
Rudolph's - because it is RED

That's all for now.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Something (More) To Thank About

I have three published books and the very first one is entitled "Something to Thank About". It talks about 15 categories of blessings that we should thank God for. What categories? Buy the book to find out (he he).

Today, I am feeling grateful. Lubos akong nagpapasalamat sa Diyos dahil...(I am very much thankful to the Lord because...)

...nilikha niya akong maganda pero hindi ubod ng ganda kasi mahirap ang kulitin ng sobrang daming manliligaw (He created me beautiful but not too beautiful because it is difficult being pursued by too many suitors)

...nakapag-graduate ako sa UP bilang pasang-awang magna cum laude (at hindi lang magna cum loud mouth) at ito ay isang karangalang buo kong maipagmamalaki hanggang sa aking libingan (I was able to graduate from UP as an almost-not magna cum laude...and not just a magna cum loud mouth)

...meron akong pinagkikitaan pero hindi naman ako super yaman kaya hindi ako target ng mga holdappers (unless they just want to hold my hand), carnappers (alaws na akong tsikot) at kidnappers (I'm no longer a kid, you know) [I have some sources of income but I am not super rich to be the target of holduppers...unless they just want to hold my hand, carnappers...I don't have a car anymore, and kidnappers...I'm no longer a kid, you know]

...squatter ako sa isang high-rise condo na may view ng sunset at madaling puntahan ng kahit sino - kasama na ang aking mga magiging tagahanga (I am staying for "free" in a high-rise condominium with a view of the sunset and it can easily be found by anybody...including my would-be admirers)

...marami akong mga talento tulad ng pagsasayaw, pagsasalita sa publiko, pagsusulat (ows?), pagko-color ng coloring book at sobrang dami pa [hindi ko na lang inilista rito kasi nahahalata nang hindi ako humble] (I have many talents like dancing, speaking in public, writing [really?], coloring coloring books and so much more...I'm not listing them here because it would be obvious I am not humble)

...marami akong mga katangiang kinagigiliwan ng karamihan ng nakakakilala sa akin - unang-una na ang aking sense of humor (talaga ha?), ang aking kabaitan, ang aking pagiging mapagmahal at mapagbigay, ang aking malambot na puso...kulang na lang ay ang mag-madre ako pero wala yatang kumbentong tatanggap sa akin (I have many qualities that most of those who know me like about me...starting with my sense of humor [oh really now?], my kindness, my being loving and generous, and my soft heart...what is lacking is for me to be a nun but no convent is likely to accept me)

...napakaraming nagmamahal sa akin - kamag-anak man o kaibigan - na sa aking pagkakaalam ay tapat at tunay...wala akong ni isang kaaway (kung meron man, scared silang magpakilala sa akin) (so many people love me...relatives or friends...who in my knowledge are all faithful and true...not a single enemy [if I had any, they are too scared to let me know])

...mayroon akong isang anak na lalaki na sobrang gwapo, mabait at magalang pag may kailangan, at may kakaibang sense of humor (mas nakakatawa pa siya sa akin, haay buti naman!) (I have a son that is so handsome, kind and courteous when he needs something from me with a unique sense of humor...he is even funnier than me, good thing!)

...ang aking beautiful mother ay ako pa ang pinagsisilbihan - siya ang aking cook, tagalinis, tagapalengke at taga-grocery, caregiver, messenger, collector, tagagupit ng kuko at marami pang iba (my beautiful mother is the one serving me...she is my cook, cleaner, wet marketer, grocery-goer, caregiver, messenger, collector, cutter of my nails and many more)

...ang buhay ko "sobrang layo" (in English, "so far") ay makulay, masaya, may halong lungkot at pighati siyempre para hindi naman ako masyadong kainggitan (my life so far is colorful, joyful, mixed with sadness and sorrow of course so that I won't be too envied)

...may Boyfriend akong nagmamahal sa akin nang lubos-lubos, ang pag-ibig Niya ay hindi masukat at hindi matitimbang...ang initials Niya ay "JC" (I have a Boyfriend who loves me truly, and His love cannot be measured or weighed...his initials are "JC")

For all these ang more, thank You, Lord! You are a God who cannot be outgiven!

Friday, December 19, 2008

My Ba 173 Class Part 2

Okay, as promised, here's part 2...

Li, use Ledesma in a sentence: LED-ES-MA-terial used for pencils

Use, Lori, Luthie and Lucia in a sentence: I'm LORI for her - na LUTHIE sa negosyo, na-LUCIA pa ang boyfriend, kotse at bahay.

What is slow and thick-skinned at the same time? MACAPAGAL!

Use Cheska in a song: (sing) CHESKA roasting on an open fire.

Filbert, use Maceda in a sentence: MACEDA ang damit niya!

Use Stephen in a sentence: A corpse is STEPH-EN-cold.

Faith, use Pagulayan in a sentence: To make your dishes more healthy, PAGULAYAN mo!

Van, use Palpagan in a sentence: PALPAGAN mo ang kumot, iho, para mawala ang alikabok!

Yla, what is "stops" in Filipino? PARAS

Use Larice, April, Ramos, and Peter in three sentences: Ang daming LARICE sa mukha nyo. Last April pa yata kayo huling naghi-RAMOS! Wash up - PETER now or never!

Use Ace in a song: (sing) My ACE adore you...

Use Farrah in a song: (sing) So FARRAH-way...

Use Aldren in a sentence: Oh no, my tita with five kids is pregrant ALDREN!

Michelle, use Sanchez in a sentence: Ale, SAN-CHEZ sandwich and Coke please!

Use Segui, Marianne and Sese in two sentences: SEGUI, pwede mo gawin yan, MARIANNE! Di ka magse-SESE.

Lea, use Tenedoro in a sentence: Bakit ka nagkakamay - hetong TENEDORO!

Migs, use Tirona in a sentence: Ayaw ko yang food mo - TIRONA!

Will, use Velasco in a sentence: Hi, meet Amy, ang VELASCO.

Use Markie, Anna, Yuzon, Yap, Richie, Yan, and Villafuerte in two sentences: MARKIE, she's ANNA-der good catch for YU-ZON. YAP, RICHIE YAN, may VILLA-FUERTE ka kung mapapasagot mo.

So that's it. Sorry guys for playing with your names. It's all clean (and corny) fun! Happy Holidays!

Ms. Gamo

Thursday, December 18, 2008

My BA 173 Class Part 1

Last semester, I had the wonderful opportunity of teaching at UP again. I taught Consumer Behavior to 58 students. I do enjoy teaching but due to my illnesses, I had to stop.

Since I'm such a punster, I would like to use this blog to "use my students' names/surnames in vain". So here goes:

Rhea, use "Abaloyan" in a sentence: Kung nakakuha ka ng 2.5 in any subject, ABALOYAN!

How do you say "Wala nang macho?" in Kapampangang English? EMMAN...ALA-GON!

Who among my students wants to be like Anna? E di si ANNABEE!

Why shouldn't Vicki marry Barnett? Kasi ALVERO na, BALBERIA pa. (Dapat beauty salon!)

France, use Ambrocio in a sentence: Tatlo AMBROCIO - si Noel, Norenz at Nerick Gamo.

Juancho, use Barretto in a sentence: Ano BARRETTO sa Pilipinas? Langit o impiyerno?

Vem, anong tawag mo sa artistang bow ng bow? E di BAUTISTA!

Dan, use Belleza in a sentence: Masarap ang tuna BELLE-ZA restawran na yan!

Erick, use Camba in a sentence: Thank you for coming, CAMBA again!

Aries, use Carlos in a sentence: Ang nacarnapan ay na-CARLOS!

Dems, use Cosio in a sentence: (sing) I'm everything I love me!

What did one artist say to a visitor? You can't touch anything CUSTODIO ko 'to!

Anong tawag mo sa pakpak ng isang lion? WENG DE LEON!

Anong tawag mo sa bananang ubos na? DE SAGUN!

How do you translate "the erased border"? EDGE DORADO

Anong gagawin mo kung masyadong mahaba ang isang stick? EBARLE mo!

Use Echanis, Esteban and Estacio in a sentence: ECHANIS-an ang dalawang grupo at nagESTE(la)BAN sila kaya nauwi sa ESTACIOn ng pulis!

Bakit hindi pwedeng mag-asawa sina Ms. Rojas at si Nigel? Kasi (k)RAISIA na, FELIPE pa! (ano yon, sira?)

I have 3 Garcias in my class - ADZ must be good in math, JANINE must love rice, and CEL loves her mobile phone.

Ms. Go, use Kating in a sentence: When I itch, KATING-kati ako!

What is a female tiger in Filipino, Tet? Ti-GRAJO.

Ms. Jamisola, use Mia in a sentence: Wait lang, MIA-mia na po.

Kim, where is the Vatican located? SAEROM!

Watch out for part 2!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

The Perfect Man

The perfect man...

...he celebrates the day we first met because for him, it is THE most important day of his life

...he looks at me as if I were the most beautiful woman on earth

...he holds my soft, velvety, meant-for-holding hands at every possible moment (even when we are dining out)

...he enjoys dancing with me including swing, cha-cha, other ballroom dances but his most favorite is "sweet" or slow dance

...he loves gazing at sunsets and full moons with me because he enjoys the view, and the company much better

...he likes walking along the beach with me at may pa sway-sway pa because he loves nature, and loves me a zillion times more!

...he can engage in hours-long conversations with me, from the "mababaw" to the most sublime topics

...he enjoys snuggling with me to watch a romantic comedy (DVD - original, not pirated of course) but only half-concentrating because he could hardly breathe with my oh so close presence

...he plays Scrabble with me and tries to score high so I can get the satisfaction of playing my favorite game and competing against a worthy opponent

...he cooks meals (especially my favorite dishes - lechon, kare-kare, rellenong manok, paella) - for me, knowing that I am a hopeless cook and that I love to eat

...he loves to sing love songs to me with lyrics like "I was born for you", "wherever you're going, I'm going your way", "how do I live without you?" [he also insists on doing the singing, knowing that I'm sintonado to the nth degree]

...he reads my books and blogs over and over again, savoring every word like I was the greatest writer ever born

...he laughs at my jokes, no matter how corny (which makes him a rare breed indeed!)

...he does not laugh with the others when I commit boo-boos but quietly corrects me in private so that I may not be embarrassed again in the future

...he wipes my tears away whenever I cry but refrains from saying "Don't cry, Shopgirl" (because that line has been used by Tom Hanks in "You've Got Mail")

...he understands me through and through and accepts me even if I am at my worst

...he thinks I'm perfect despite my many imperfections, warts, alipunga and all

...he is 100% honest with me and with everybody else because like me, he believes that honesty is the next best policy (the best policy for a future blog)

...he has much to be proud of but says little of his own accomplishments - humility is a virtue I cannot proudly claim but can learn from him

...he has such a big heart he cannot be outloved by anyone but humble enough to receive love even in small ways

...he cannot answer the question, "How do you love Nimia?"...he would just say "I cannot count the ways"

...he is all these and so much more!

And so I have come to three conclusions:

1) The perfect man is Jesus.
2) The perfect man does not exist.
3) The perfect man does exist!....(in my incurable romantic mind)

p.s. If you beg to disagree with number 2, you know how to get in touch with me he he.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

A Lot of "Pathy"

Just a few weeks ago, I sent the following e-mail to many of my friends. Many emailed back saying they admire my sense of humor. So that is what this blogsite is about - making people laugh even at my expense.

Dear friends,

Aside from my usual illnesses (diabetes, renal anemia, bi-polar mood disorder, etc.), I've recently discovered that I have osteoporosis pati (also) radyculopathy pati (also) diabetic neuropathy. Puro (a lot of) "pathy" but I asked for no sympathy, only prayers. Feel free to visit also if you want but I am not bedridden like last year. I just have to walk around with a cane at a speed of 20 hours per mile, as my mom would put it.

I was rushed to the hospital last Thursday because I was having chest pains and difficulty of breathing which comes and goes. I asked my son to look up the symptoms of heart attack sa Internet and kasama mga ito so nagpaambulance na kami (and these were included so we already called an ambulance). Sarap pala sumakay ng ambulansya! (I didn't know it feels great riding an ambulance!) Feeling VIP! (I felt like a VIP!) Thank God they ruled out heart attack after doing an ECG, blood tests, x-ray, etc. The verdict? Cough! I have a terrible cough which I have a hard time expelling because try having a cough and back pains at the same time. Naiiritate daw yung thoracic lining ko and may infection na (They said my thoracic lining got irritated and there is an infection already) so I was given mucolytic, antibiotic, pain reliever, and asked to use a nebulizer as needed. So now, I'm taking 25 medicines a day.

Hay naku (Oh my), at the height of this, my funny son texted his friends to say "my mom is suffering from a mild heart attack". He also said that from head to foot something is wrong with me. Totoo naman (True enough):

1) HEAD - chronic recurrent bi-polar mood disorder (hey, I ain't manic-depressive, I'm bi-polar!)
2) EYES - near sighted with astigmatism
3) HEART - enlarged with a murmur daw - people have always said I'm big-hearted; (I'm also lonely-hearted, he he)
4) BACK - parang (like) coffee - may (with) scoliosis, sciatica and osteoporosis - edi (so) three in one!
5) BLOOD - diabetes
6) KIDNEY - renal anemia
7) NERVES - diabetic neuropathy
8) WEIGHT and HEIGHT - overweight, underheight (138 lbs for my height of 4'10" - I shrank 3 inches because of my sciatica)
9) TUMMY - pregnant looking
10) LEGS - bow-legged
11) FEET - flat footed, with occasional edema
12) WORST SICKNESS OF ALL! - cough with severe back pain

I've always believed that laughter is the best medicine but God is the Supreme Healer. So keep praying and send those jokes.

Take care. I love you all!